I'm sorry, I don't make the rules, but your favorite language is not as good as C. I'll lay out some arguments as to why this is the case, but in the end it is the greatest, no matter what you think.
C isn't the most popular language, although it is very common (as seen in Fig. 1). This means C is woefully underreppresented, a mistake I shall strive to remedy. There is no use case that C cannot cover, if you are thinking of something that C couldn't do, I think you have a skill issue, and a lack of imagination. Both of these can be remedied by learning more C.
After using C, people have reported feeling better about themselves, are more open to change, and just generally live a better livestyle. These are statistics that I made up, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't listen to me. Yes, it does sound like a cult. C promises to fix your work and personal problems; this may be unbelievable to people. I ask you to open your mind. If C is a cult, it's a beneficial cult. We don't ask you to sacrifice anything.
(Except your sanity)
On to the benefits! Visit the Performance, Simplicity, and Ruthlessness pages to get to know your new way of life, because C is so much more than a programming language.
